I’ve had this in the blog bank for a while now, and for some reason today seems like the perfect time to share it!
It’s a message I wrote when I was in the midst of some stepfamily stressors myself… but also during a time when some family members were going through their own type of hell.
Taking a look at the big picture really helped put things into perspective for me… With any luck, it will do the same for you...
Next time you're in the midst of another stepfamily saga... When you feel like life can’t get anymore crazy and unpredictable... when you just can't wrap your head around why things have to be so freaking complicated... just remember this....
Everyone has sh*t to deal with in their life. Everyone!
That mom and dad with the perfect nuclear family you admire so much… they may be in-over-their-head with debt or have someone in their family dealing with stage 4 cancer.
Your friend who is dating a man, sans kids, travelling the world and going out for nice extravagant dinners... she may be secretly fighting a battle with depression.
Your single friend, who appears to have a rocking social life and have all the time in the world to do what she wants, when she wants... she is actually lonely as hell and cries herself to sleep from time to time.
That newlywed couple... the ones who got to plan their wedding without having to coordinate it around access schedules and ex-wife drama. They may be struggling with infertility.
The point of this post isn't to minimize the angst of your stepfamily stressors (or mine for that matter!) Not in the least bit. Being a stepmom and blending a family is no easy feat.
The point is to remind you that in life, everyone has sh*t to deal with. Everyone has problems.
Stepfamily Drama just happens to be (one of) yours.
Just like any problem in life, you have choices.
You can choose to dwell and let the problem consume you,
you can figure out how you're going to deal with it in the most positive way possible.
Because no matter what the problem is... no matter how many factors are out of your control... you have the power to decide how you're going to let it affect you.
It's about boundaries, it's about perspective, it's about deciding what you will and will not allow to knock you on your ass.
I’m not saying it’s easy!! It’s not, trust me. It takes some work. It takes a change in your thoughts… it takes a little ownership, boundaries, empathy and many times a couple bottles of Pinot Grigio …. But it’s possible.
Speaking of doing the work.... On May 2, I am launching the The KICK-ASS Stepmom Project, a one-of-a-kind group program for stepmoms who are ready for change! It's all about finding a way to live a KICK-ASS LIFE and be a KICK-ASS STEPMOM no matter what stepfamily stressors you’re dealing with AND no matter how many curve balls your stepfamily life throws your way!
If you’re ready to do the work, dig deep into the nitty gritty and start to take control of an uncontrollable situation, I’d love to have you join us!
Click here to learn more!