Because the truth is, none of us have ALL the answers. Nobody has the perfect marriage, or the perfect kids, or the perfect life.
because guess what, he's pretty damn dependant on me too!
Because lists like these are always fun!
This summer I made the commitment to start reading more.
So far I've done okay. By that I mean, I've managed to read one book.
(Hey, when you were doing ZERO reading to begin with, it's pretty easy to make some progress)
Yes, I am actually saying this out loud... Even though it was my choice, there were times when I was really struggling with our inability to get pregnant, that I wondered whether my decision to be a stepmom robbed me from having the number of children I was truly meant to have.
Comments in the thread below were full of other moms, giving each other virtual high-fives and pats on the back.
Part of me chuckled at these status updates because they made me feel less guilty. But another part of me became a little annoyed and a little jealous.
Here is where the double standard between moms and stepmoms rears its ugly head.
This book doesn't encourage you to not give a beep about ANYTHING.... it shows you how to direct your time and energy towards the things that are worth giving a beep about.
With the number of blended families and stepmoms in our Society, the stigma and assumptions often surprise me. Especially because I am connected with so many stepmoms who absolutely adore their stepchildren and treat them as they are their own.
HOWEVER after I posted the rant, I receive a message from one of my Instagram Followers that brought me back to reality.
Look, I don't always post nitty gritty details about my own personal struggles, because I am very cognicent about how what I write affects the people in my family. The internet is forever, and I refuse to air my dirty laundry online. But make no mistake, it's not always rainbows & unicorns. From my experiences as a child of divorce all the way to a stepmom, like many of you, I have experienced abandonment, personal attacks, high-conflict situations, heartache and even accusations.
I love this age. My daughter turns three in just under a month and I have to say this is my favourite age yet. Even though it is heart breaking that my baby girl, is no longer a baby girl, watching her to grow into the spunky, kind-hearted, funny girl that she is, makes my heart do things I didn't know were possible. It's also makes me think... a lot. Specifically about who I am as a parent and what I want to teach this young impressionable little girl. It's no longer about skin-to-skin and feeding schedules. It's about supporting her in becoming a caring, kind-hearted, successful and ambitious human being.
Well hello, Thursday. All I can say is thank-goodness tomorrow is Good Friday and this week is wrapping itself up.
Why?
Well, because it's been one of those weeks. Don't worry, nothing monumental or disastrous has happened. There hasn't been a crisis of any sorts. It's just that literally nothing has gone right.
In fact, as I type this post I'm chuckling to myself at how things have gone down this week. It's been one crazy that random event after another....
Most nights I lay awake worrying... and scrolling through my phone. In the morning, I was so tired my face hurt. I couldn't get organized and despite a never ending to-do list, I couldn't seem to scratch things off.Instead, I caught myself meaninglessly scrolling through my social media feeds, responding to emails that could wait... and like I said, being unproductive!
I normally keep things pretty positive around here. But today, I just need to get some things off my chest. It’s been weighing on me for a while now, and well… something needs to be said.
Today I am writing this post because the internet has been pissing me right off. Yes, that’s right the internet. Specifically, the people on the internet.
More specifically, the topic and issues that are getting so much attention from mothers.
Day after day I find myself scrolling through my newsfeed asking myself, “why do they even care?”
Let me explain.
Surrounding yourself with positive, supportive women who believe there is enough success to go around can make all the difference in the world!
But there is something else I wish for them. Something that I am starting to realize JUST how lucky I am to have.
There will be a time when the kids are all grown-up. When co-parenting, child support, vacation schedules and all the tedious conversations that come with blended family life will no longer be part of your day-to-day.
Over the past several months I’ve tried to play it cool when people ask whether or not we are going to have another baby. “We’re not trying to, but we’re not trying not to”. “We’re so busy, who knows if we can handle another child”. “Someday for sure, just waiting for the perfect time”
“We’re going to wait until after [insert next big event here] to start trying. The truth is, we have been trying for several months. Hard. And we've had no luck.
I've made it no secret that every now and then, I am blown away by some of the things that come out of people’s mouths! The things that people have said about my role as a stay-at-home-mom/stepmom, working-at-home-mom… however you want to categorize me on any particular day, is no exception.
Last week my hairdresser and I had a brief conversation about motherhood, and the notion of having it all together.We both agreed, somedays we feel like we've totally rocked this whole motherhood gig and other days, well, not so much.
I am someone who love a fresh start... any chance to reflect, plan and regroup. Monday's, September, January, the beginning of a new month. They all make me giddy!So giddy that this time, I'm not waiting for the beginning of 2017 to get started! I'm starting right NOW!
Despite waking up to new pearl earrings from my amazing husband (thank-you babe, I promise not to lose this pair) the day was pretty much business as usual. Actually, it was a little more chaotic than usual.
Your comment was a wonderful reminder of why I have chosen to be so open about life as a stepmom in the first place.
I used to think talking about gratitude was so cheesy! I'd scroll through my newsfeed seeing articles & quotes about the power of being grateful, and think *barf* what a load of hocus pocus...
Last night at about 8:30 pm, I made the strategic decision to call it a day. I put the whiney toddler to sleep, made sure the other kids were set up for the next day, crawled into my bed ...
I've been in a "stepmom" role for about four years now. Does it make me a veteran? Hell no! But I think I have a pretty good grasp on things (most days anyway)
Anywho, a few nights ago, we were sitting at my in-laws house, relaxing after a crazy day when we realized that our two-year-old did what two-year-olds do.... She pooped.
Rock paper scissors...
Paper covers rock
Sweet! My husband was on diaper duty!
I sat back, all ready to pour a glass of vino and a lightbulb went off in my head!
I forgot the diapers at home. Yep! it was 8:50pm on Saturday night and I had a shitty baby sans diapers!
I wanted to snap. I was so disappointed in myself and honestly my husband wasn't that thrilled with me either. All we had were three swim diapers and if you're familiar with them, they don't hold jack(shit).
As a blogger, one of my favourite things to do is sip on my morning coffee and scroll through the latest blog posts from my favourite Blogging Websites.
Facebook, being the creepily perceptive beast that it is, has tuned into this favourite pastime of mine, and tailored my newsfeed accordingly.
However, as I scroll through my newsfeed, sipping on my java, I notice a very clear pattern in the parenting blogging world.
As I am sure you’ve noticed, social media, bloggers and parenting experts have done a phenomenal (and I use that term loosely) job at categorizing the different types of parents.
A couple weeks ago, my husband and I were lucky enough to get away to one of our favourite places... The French River.
We are members of a houseboat up there.
Now before you say get this picture of a luxorious houseboat in your head, you need to know this thing is a bit of monstrosity. It's about the next best thing to sleeping on the ground!
Either way, we love it. It's by far our favourite place in the world. But like I said, it's roughing it. You're parked in nature, a pretty decent boat ride away from anything civilized.
With all the joys of going off the grid, come certain risks. Risks like rodents and reptiles. Snakes and mice to be exact.
Hey there!
Well, we are officially in our summer groove over here!
We just wrapped up our first week with the kids and it was full everything that summer should be!
Ice cream runs, batting cages, beach days, sleep-ins, and some serious giggles!
(My stepchildren come every other week, so because of the schedule, our official summer kick-off was a bit delayed)
For some reason, I'm more excited about summer than I have been for the longest time. I feel like a kid again! I think it has something to do my husband and I making an intentional mindset shift.
Lately, there has been all sorts of bad news around us. People getting sick, tragic accidents, shootings, riots, you name it.
All of a sudden there I was. Hiding behind a fence from my husband's ex-wife.